Fran Lebowitz Quotes

Most popular Fran Lebowitz Quotes

Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
— Fran Lebowitz

food

Think before you speak.  Read before you think.

advisory thinking

Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.
— Fran Lebowitz

funny life

Rome is unquestionably the lunch capital of the world.
— Fran Lebowitz

Italy

I love sleep because it is both pleasant and safe to use.

sleep

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.

children parenting

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.
— Fran Lebowitz

school

There is no such thing as inner peace.  There is only nervousness or death.

inner peace

The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
— Fran Lebowitz

conversation listening

The opposite of talking isn't listening.  The opposite of talking is waiting.

listening conversation talking

To me the outdoors is what you must pass through in order to get from your apartment into a taxicab.
— Fran Lebowitz

nature

The conversational overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive.

conversation

Magazines all too frequently lead to books and should be regarded by the prudent as the heavy petting of literature.
Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not have possibly met.

originality

Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not possibly have met.

thinking

Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
— Fran Lebowitz

adolescence

Generally speaking, I look upon them as dangerous and tiring activities performed by people with whom I share nothing except the right to trial by jury.
— Fran Lebowitz

sports

When it comes to sports I am not particularly interested. Generally speaking, I look upon them as dangerous and tiring activities performed by people with whom I share nothing except the right to trial by jury.
— Fran Lebowitz

sports

Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to irritate the situation by making an effort. If you have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass.
— Fran Lebowitz

artists

Girls who put out are tramps. Girls who don't are ladies. This is, however, a rather archaic usage of the word. Should one of you boys happen upon a girl who doesn't put out, do not jump to the conclusion that you have found a lady. What you have probably found is a lesbian.
— Fran Lebowitz

sex